“We would have no trouble accepting the decision a man might make at a time when his nation faces a genuine threat to its security to leave his family and join the armed forces, even when by doing so he might risk death, thereby orphaning his children and widowing his wife. Most people would regard this as an act of courage and self-sacrifice. So why then should we feel such a decision is unwarranted when a person seeks to gain full enlightenment and unshakable liberation—an achievement that would bring vast merit to his family if they accepted his decision with love and trust?” Inquiring Mind
The Buddha’s Great Renunciation mirrors mine
Beyond a decade ago, I called my Mom’s Son to check up on them, for another Man to pick up the phone saying, “stop calling, they don’t want you anymore.”
This was after going a day without calling her. She moved away from our hometown to live with her Dad 100 miles away, thus the distance. While with her, I faced the “regulatory” script: Don’t dream big, dream normal. Don’t sing.
I didn’t know at the time, but the Buddha suggests to renounce ones deepest attachment, their family, to achieve enlightenment & liberation which ultimately brings them enlightenment & liberation, & for the surrounding world. The Western World laughs at this idea, but I set out to save the world, healing it to the best of my ability. I knew music today is practically the only way for your words to be heard globally, & thus a global effect. If the words aren’t bejeweled in musical ornament, most won’t hear. So I never gave up.
As I grew, so did the realization that my sacrifices helped make the growth possible. I eventually went on to renounce automobiles after realizing my greatest growth spurt came from becoming static. Suddenly I could feel the breeze and see the trees. Moving at the speed of stillness. Unshakable like an elephant. With that success came confidence. With that confidence arrived the strength to renounce what the Western World holds now in greater regard than even ones family and even takes the place of the Divine…profit. Even Western World built AI systems see’s this choice as self destructive. It’s only fathomable to those that have lived on the streets, or those granted Indigenous teachings. The Lenape had no money at all, yet flourished. Though doing such within the confines of a system built to outlaw the prior, renouncing money itself in most living situations requires an absolute dependency and thus faith in the Divine.
Strange things happen when you take leaps of faith. Just when you think getting a day job is the only way to uphold the foundation where music can be made, suddenly you find a way to make just enough to pay the living expenses. If you can’t afford fish oil, someone “randomly” brings you fish. like a tree in perfect stillness, the nutrients arrive when needed. The wind arrives when needed.
“When Buddha encouraged others to go forth into “homelessness,” he generally recognized that such people had the capacity to attain final realization in the present life.”
This is so parallel, as I did sacrifice my life to the streets while maintaining perfect hygiene, and the teachings it revealed were the most liberating. Life felt like a video game. Suddenly I had all the time in the world. The best part about it is how easy it is to make new friends. In middle America, mostly everything and everyone is compartmentalized. Food not a gift from nature upon a tree, but a product in a store. Community, something you only find if you pay the ticket of entry or purchase a round of drinks. The streets shake this globe up entirely and that shake up is what someone deeply invested into the idea of money as success, is afraid of. That shake up is what the European’s initially encountered when their world collided with the Indigenous.
The realization I always searched for but never would of dreamt of actually finding is the revelation of the Divine. It didn’t change for me to see it, I had to change to see it. I’d laugh at the idea of “finding God” from the very people welcoming to share their home. Now I laugh at the idea of my younger self who somehow couldn’t see the Divine, for the pain.
the renouncement that led me to the streets, led me to the realization of safety. Homelessness is the myth & fear that people use to control us. Same with Jail. It’s to the point that people end their life if they’re facing either one. They haven’t realized the freedom. They haven’t realized how many attachments they think they need to maintain just to stay sane, when in reality, they’d be happier with nothing, thus everything.
Even this degree of satisfaction in life with the things meant to scare us, enrages those that have all the material possessions said to make them happy, yet all they end up with is a self righteous bitterness, that places “hard work” above “stillness.”
Hard Work vs. Stillness
The Western Society is built upon Hard Work. The Eastern Society is built upon Stillness, though due to pressurization from the West to “compete,” is growing shakily like the west.
Stillness awaits us all, either by surrender, or force. There’s no escaping it. A foundation We all truly stand upon a foundation of stillness in motion, be it time or orbit. When community is built upon that peace, we honor and respect and learn from those Eldest. When community is built upon hard work, we overlook and forget the Eldest, while even taking away their freedom if they reveal a teaching of the mind like “I forgot what road my house is on.” Stillness see’s that as revelation. Hard work sees that as retirement home.
My Current Balance
Today I hold the memory of that freedom living on the streets, every day anew. Today my recording equipment anchors me in one place, regardless of weather. I know I’d be happier on the streets ultimately, though there’s a certain happiness I get from making and recording music, that is a high like no other. I do realize it to be a high, I do realize the withdrawals it brings also. I do realize hard work then as a vice. I do realize that one day, I will forget how to make music. I do realize one day I will forget how to breath. I do realize and accept the waves of up and downs that music making brings.
AND…… I realize the one thing we all have to fall back on when venturing these paths. Words. They’re what we have and what keeps growing regardless what we face. Like the Buddha that has the stillness of meditation to remedy any scenario, Word’s are our way to do it, in service. I do realize that service in no better than stillness, and that is my final surrender. Acceptance.